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| EDITOR'S NOTE ----- Welcome everyone to the Northern Iowa Delta Chi Global Star News, volume 1! As editor I will be looking for input to this periodical in both pictures and stories. This is of course a tabloid done in fun, so nothing should be taken seriously. Feel free to email me with your snapshots and tales at dchi(at)errthum.com. I will also be posting letters to the editor (if I get any) on any subject written by ANY Delta Chi. Warning: I did not write all of the following, or take the pictures! |
COLUMN 1 GIRL Every issue will have a woman pictured who has had an influence on our chapter. This issue's is Miss Colleen Urbain, seen here flashing the Nixon Victory before leaving Thailand. Colleen just graduated from Palmer's School of Chiropractic and Voodoo. While at UNI she lived next door to the house and had she been male, would of been a member. STAR ACTOR UPDATE This one is from our sources in Hollywood. 1996 Graduate Adam Powell has been living with Alum Daryl Kruse out in California. Mr. Powell graduated with an Acting Degree and is trying to make it big in the city of stars. But, as this shows, the road to the top is hard. While some struggling actors talk about eating dogfood to get by, Adam will have to tell stories of eating pillows! At first one feels compassion for this poor out of work soul, but then you have to remember if he makes it he will be extremely rich and marry a super model!DCHI'S FIGHT CRACK It has been learned that the many remodeling products at the house has not been without the pain of--CRACK(pure white I might add). The photo you see was stolen from the DEA's file. It is a photo of a raid to stop this abuse of crack. Although unidentified, it is beleived to be the back side of none other than the current president, Mark Bromwich! No charges were filed, but Mark has been put under the custody of his wife who is now responsible for dressing him.SUMO MANIA The recent popularity of professional wrestling has also sparked the resurgence of Sumo. And who would be Delta Chi's best choice? BOSSMAN--but of course. Here the Delta Chi Alum Brian Smith (aka Bossman) poses while on his tournament tour to win a chance to go up against Japan's best. A couple of inspiring wrestlers pose with him (Boss is in the center). Northern Iowa's claim to the largest Delta Chi ever remains untouched. |
VIRGIN EXPOSED As his contemporaries know, Troy Errthum has always claimed he was a virgin(by choice). It was also know that for some reason, Troy was disappointed during his iniation that there was no hazing (a standard at Delta Chi). The photo here was found among several documenting Alum Kirk Dimler's recent wedding. It exposes Mr. Errthum for all he is--A SHEEP RAPER! To make matters worse, an anonymous source stated the picture was taken in a church basement. Whatever happend to decency?[EDITORS NOTE: Let thee who is willing to stone thy self be the first to throw stones at thou.] SURF'S UP DUDE Alumni President Danial Kruse has been known to lead secret lives hidden from the view of others. His wife, Tracy, now reports that Danno had decided to be a beach bum in California. This photo shows the proud man before his surfing debut. Tracy says he quickly came back home to be a financial advisor after not being able to stand up on the board. It was also made known that a surfer gang beat him up worse than the time the football team did at a bar called the Stein.MILLER SEEN WITH SCANDALOUS WOMEN While covering Clinton's Perjury in Washington, our local correspondant snapped this. In it is a picture of one of the Miller twins sitting next to two women on a park bench. We are in the process of identifying the women, but it appears to be none other than Linda Tripp and Monica Lewinsky! This sheds new light on the character of Mr. Miller. We are still unsure if its the good or evil twin, but it is more than likely the evil one. This story is developing...MIKE FORMANEK CATCHING UP WITH TECHNOLOGY This writer has been notified that Mike Formanek once again has an email! He has finally decided to give up on the comeback of 8-tracks and Beta. 1st Lt. Formanek says a computer is in the works for next year (hopefully not a Commodore64). Mean while, Troy Beam tries to stay one step ahead of him with the possible purchase of a DVD player. Mike and Beam's email can be found on the alumni page.(file photo by Mat Syverson)...................................................................... |